Goodbyes are the hardest

Knowing when to say goodbye is difficult. But sometimes, it's necessary.

Hi, Besties. How are you? I hope you are taking it easy. I hope you recognize what you do. Even whence it's in tiny steps, you show up for yourself every day... That tells you you are doing great.

Have you said goodbye to anyone recently? Wether audible or not; chanced or not. Have you?

There is a saying that every departure is like death; every return a rebirth. 

We would all see with me that most changes happen unplanned and they always leave scar(s) in one way or the other. Literally speaking, there are two ways or factors in which one can lose a dear one; either to life or to death.

Although I still can't figure out which is more preferable. But, if I may ask you, would you rather lose loved ones to life or death?

However, due to the current trend in the society today, a new factor has been identified. We sometimes don't lose them to any of the above mentioned. Rather; we lose them to the diaspora( Japa; for short). Considering the impact, it looks to me like this way is far more better than the first two. At least, you would have the chance to say proper goodbyes. By the way, did anyone notice how connections are being jeopardised due to Japa? I might as well dedicate a day to crying after everyone I'm connected to leaves.

Let me chip in a little story here. As a kid, I used to spend my summer at my aunt's. I'd cry saying goodbye to everyone at home while leaving, and I'd get emotional while leaving my aunt's for resumption too. I don't like to be around when my siblings leave for boarding school because I hate to wave them bye.

There is also when my mum had to park out of our house after my parent's divorce...I ran inside because I didn't want to say goodbye.

The last goodbye I said while growing up was in 2009 when my brother had to leave for NYSC. He woke us up very early that morning to exchange goodbyes and I started crying uncontrollably. He had to leave me when he couldn't bear it. Since then, I figured goodbye isn't meant for me so I hate to say it.

But growing up now, I have also figured that goodbyes shouldn't be one of those things I run away from. It's part of the emotions I should go through. I have always wanted to talk about this. I am glad I am finally doing this...I feel like every time I write it gets me emotional, especially when it's coming from the deeper part of my heart. I presently have tears clouded up in my eyes. I've shared my heart and soul with people and saying goodbyes to them will cost me a part of me.

I have found a home in the home and outside of the home that saying goodbye to could cost me emotional trauma.

There is a thing about endings and it's that you never knew when they are going to come. You could be speaking the last words and you wouldn't even know. You could be hugging someone for the last time and you wouldn't know, you could be having your last best moments together and you wouldn't know.

One certain fact is that we are all allowed to make the best out of our last moments with people we love. We have the opportunity to say our last goodbyes but we wouldn't know so we didn't say any goodbye. If we had known, we would have hugged them longer the last time we did. We would have told them more about how we felt.

So dear friend, every single being in your life will have their last day with you and since we don't know when it will come, make every moment and interaction beautiful and worthwhile.

Thinking deep about it now, I think we should say more goodbyes so we can have so many welcomes. To everyone I haven't manned up to saying goodbye to, I hope one day I'd be able to put together the balls to do so and leave everything we've ever shared as what they are...MEMORIES!

see you soon.

Teni❤